I was fortunate enough to always have older friends in my life. The benefits of having older friends is that they make you realise life wouldn’t be sorted in the way you have dreamt off. Life is still going to be a struggle and a confusion. Life is going to be a mess. I did learn that when I was 23-24 working with my colleagues in their 30s. Does having a premonition make it better? Who knows?

What it does is to not expect. Not expect things to fall in place suddenly, not expect that miracles happen and not expect that I would change. It’s not demotivating but rather more motivating than usual. Once you know that magic doesn’t exist, you become a realist in this world. Yes, your life becomes a bit boring, but would I trade that with realism of life – No Ways! Being a realist helps and being an overthinker makes you the mess you are.

So how do you make a sense of all of it? As a realist!

The guiding light is actually acceptance. And that is what I feel this blog is about.

At 28, I feel I want to accept the truths of life. I want to accept that I won’t probably become a prince someday, but accept that to even become a tenth of it I will have to work extremely hard. Accept that while money is going to make my life happier, and more comfortable, I just don’t care about it enough. I wanna accept that my choices in life so far have been my own and I want to forgive or forget grudges kept against others now, because the onus of my life is now all mine.

It’s a strange conjecture honestly, to be here. Knowing that you are almost in your 30s and while that is going to happen your 20s are also over. It’s scary, knowing you are older now and powerful as well. Somedays it’s just a fleeting experience of how your responsbile-less part of life has ended and what lays ahead is a life you have somewhat seen in the POV of your parents. You didn’t knew how the youth would be, but being an adult you know!

At 28, I also genuinely want to be a good person. But good I can’t be, I can only thrive to be there, to do good and keep doing good because it won’t stop. With that I want to hope that this world will also work with me to being good, because how else would I survive. And lastly I wanna be the little curious kid in the classroom – proud, smart and not gullible.

I know I am 28 and I am free falling and I am ok. That is my acceptance. I wanna be ok mid-air, not anxious and not being whiny about it. I wanna glide in the air while falling because I just know I can. At 28, I wanna really let go, and begin small because that’s how I’ll reach anywhere. This time I don’t want to hold back, empathize yes! but not be bullied in the process. I wanna call a spade a spade even if it absolutely shakes the world.

This year I want to free fall and not be scared also because I know you are here. I wanna fall in your net and embrace you, because you, Universe, are the life giver. And I know you have been there now, it’s not an empty space I am falling off to, I know I am in good hands.

At 27, I would have said it’s going to be ok, but I won’t say that today. In the midst of a bad day, it may not feel like it’s going to be ok. What I’ll say instead is Let’s go out and spend some time, let’s see if there is a way we can find a solution about it, and if not let’s have some good food to feel good.

At 28, I have learnt : Being kind to yourself is one of the greatest kindnesses